


Touch

by GetOutOFMyTreeNovice



Category: Supernatural
Genre: Dean Being Dean, Dean needing love, M/M, Multi, Sam giving him love, and then Castiel, it's kinda sad.
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-10-17
Updated: 2013-10-17
Packaged: 2017-12-29 16:10:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 697
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/1007409
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/GetOutOFMyTreeNovice/pseuds/GetOutOFMyTreeNovice
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Dean always stretches himself out too far. Sam's there to lean on, but it's not enough.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Touch

**Author's Note:**

> I'm sorry for the formatting. I'm still new at this and jkghdfghld if anyone wants to give me lessons with the html and stuff

It's lucky Dean has Sam. Because he spends so much time stretching himself for everyone else, making sure the world is happy and safe before he can even try to sleep or goddamnit Dean, eat something. When he spreads himself out too thin and he's at his breaking point, he knows he always has Sam to fall back on. Sam will take care of him. It's always Dean taking care of everyone else. With Sam, Dean knows he can lay back and relax and let Sam take the wheel. Cause Dean knows Sam knows not to talk about it after or press for control outside of when Dean feels like this. Dean knows that Sam will take care of him right.  
  
But then Sam is gone and all Dean has is his awkward angel in a dirty trenchcoat. Dean isn't sure he can trust him fully yet, to take control like Sam did, but Dean needs it. He starts subtle, just to see how Cas does, and the angel just tilts his head at Dean, confused. He doesn't understand. Dean wants him to so badly, but he can't say it straight out. So Dean just goes to sleep and tries to remember to breathe.  
  
Sam comes back and Dean collapses into his baby brother's arms, just goes limp. Sam takes care of him and Cas just watches silently, tilting his head to the side because he still doesn't understand and Dean feels like crying because he loves Cas too. He wants Cas to take care of him too.  
  
Sometimes Sam takes care of Dean sexually too. They both know it's a sin and everything else, but it's an unspoken agreement that this is necessary for both of them. Sam needs to know he's still able to take full control and not lose it himself. Dean needs something to fall back on. So Sam takes Dean deep and slow, ignoring Dean's whines for more, and drags it out for hours, just exhausting both their bodies and getting them out of their heads for a while. Dean falls asleep right after and Sam kisses his head before going back to his own bed or sometimes he'd stay and wrap his arms around his brother. It was nice to wake up next to a warm body. And having an arm around his waist grounded Dean. Anchored him in the way he needed.  
  
Cas watches them, wondering if he'll be able to help Dean the same way Sam does.  
  
When Dean feels like himself again, he acts like nothing happened. Like he hadn't gasped out Sam's name as he came last night, digging his nails into Sam's back. Like he hadn't cried for hours in his little brother's arms. The denial hurt Sam, but he knew it was necessary too, for Dean.  
  
But Deans always dragged himself onto Sam's lap at the end of his cycle and let Sam do whatever, sometimes brush his hair or feed him, sometimes kiss him. He just needed to be coddled.  
  
And then it wasn't enough. Dean woke up still strung out and tense and he clung to Sam, grinding his teeth. It took a few days for Dean to finally relax, but he still wasn't right. Sam worried about him, but didn't mention it because it wasn't his place to.  
  
Sam prayed to Cas. Cas showed up and then Sam told him everything. And Castiel finally understood.  
  
Sam let Dean drag himself onto his lap after the day was over and rubbed Dean's back, wondering if he should tell Dean Cas would be joining them. So he asked Dean how he felt about it.  
  
“What if he did understand?” Sam asked quietly, running his fingers through his brother's hair.  
  
“Then yeah. I wouldn't mind.” Dean told him.  
  
Sam had Castiel sandwich Dean in the middle of them and they took him apart the way he needed. Just hard enough to feel it hurt, but slow enough that it wasn't rushed. No, with this they always took their time. With this, Dean needed to be completely wore out. Completely taken out of his head.  
  
Castiel was amazed when Dean smiled at him when he came.


End file.
